Using Behaviour charts for ADHD

Behaviour charts for ADHD tend to work well in school but at home there are sometimes different expectations around what is considered to be acceptable or unacceptable behaviour and this leads us to an area that we refer to as ‘CONSISTENT BOUNDARIES’

What we mean by that is that we all hold the same understanding of the same expectation, stick to the same consequences and REWARDS!

The most important aspect of this is that your child knows EXACTLY where they stand! It enables them to make better choices in life and provides a stable and structured framework to do just this!

The first stage in this is putting the boundaries and structures in place  - One of the most helpful ways of doing this is through -  the HET REWARD CHART!

Most behaviour charts break down would you believe, not because of the children not following the structure but because the parents don’t !!!!

When you stick to this approach it WORKS!!!

OK, you may need to adapt it ( and that’s why you have the support of HETs and HET website to help you if need be.) However, the majority of Reward incentive behavioural chart systems are quite inflexible. The HET system is extremely flexible and allows you to grow with your child’s progress in making better choices in life.

Right, When I am working with children I  start this process off by explaining  to the child concerned that if I want something nice then I have to work for it, to save my money and get it – now they are not old enough to go out and earn money for what they like and want in this way, but we have another form of currency through which they are able to earn AND THAT IS THROUGH THE BEHAVIOURAL REWARD CHART STRUCTURE.

There will be SOMETHING that really “does it” for your child, something that they want more than anything and this can be money, or it could be football cards or it could be time on the computer, time playing out – WHATEVER!!! The deal is that the only way they can access this ‘desire of all wants’ is through the behaviour chart.

Let’s say for argument sake, it is money that does the trick – your child wants to access money for ? – well the only way they can EARN that money is through the chart and no access to money is given in any other way.

Say grandparents want to give your child extra pocket money – then it is helpful to explain that  they might like to offer this generous donation to the cause, through added bonuses or incentive rewards to the reward chart programme.

Let’s explain how this works – step by step:

The first thing to do is to think about what it is that works for your child, e.g. the money reward etc. A contract is signed between the child and the parent(s) via a third party ( this could be your HET therapist or a teacher perhaps), someone who is one step removed from the dynamic between you and your child. It is explained to the child that a contract is a ’written promise’ and that is made and signed by the parent and the child and the witness who oversees that the promise is being kept.

The contract  is  based on the fact that on the chart, every row, or column  of 3 (ticks)  gets a sticker and that sticker can be exchanged at the end of the week for… whatever the reward is that is negotiated. This can be for example 10p for every sticker.

• Now what does your child have to do to get a sticker?
• Follow the agreed behavioural expectation.

For example, it may be that the expectation is that your child will clean and tidy their room when asked without repercussions . Let’s say you ask your child to do that and your child refuses – then you repeat the request along the lines of:

“We have agreed that for you to get any more ( stickers or ticks) then you will tidy your room – this is your first warning” ( sometimes it is helpful to use a yellow / red card system like warnings in football and actually hold them up as a visual at this stage.)

10 minutes later you repeat the request and your child goes into their room and trashes it under protest. You repeat the direction and say as above “We have agreed that for you to get any more ( stickers or ticks) then you will tidy your room – this is your second  warning.”

Now at this point if they go into their room and put it right then they are still on for a sticker. If however they do not and it goes to a third warning then a cross goes into place on the chart.

It may well be that your child becomes verbally abusive in which case you give the warning:“We have agreed that it is not acceptable for you to speak to me like that – this is your first warning!”etc

Now obviously you will have to phrase your comments in an age appropriate way for your child to understand. However, we work on the famous “Rule of Three” – three warnings and then a cross goes on the chart reducing the chance of sticker / reward.

Now many charts fall down at this point because if your child blows it in the morning, then really why bother for the rest of the day? They have lost out so what is the point – this chart structure always allows your child the ‘buy back’ option – For example, they may have lost it in the morning but it is still worth going for it, in the afternoon because they can still get a row of ticks if they conform in the afternoon.

Now always make sure that you can deliver your end of the contract for example – check how much the chart can earn in a week for example if you offer £1 per sticker and your child earns 30 stickers that week it can start to get a bit expensive!

Remember I said that other members of the family may undermine the chart? Let’s say for example Nan and Granddad come to visit and decide to give  your cute, adorable, well behaved child (???) Who??? Some extra pocket money – you can see that this can start to undermine the chart – hang on a minute, they don’t have to  do what you want them to do – they can get money off Nan – so there….. , they can get their own money this way – Whooohey!

AND…… you r whole chart structure has just fallen through!

So in this respect it is helpful to ask the visiting grandparents if they would like to offer an incentive for example they will give an extra £1 to every 3 stickers earned etc.

Charts should be displayed in an appropriate and prominent place e.g. on the family notice board / fridge door etc.  so that everyone can see what is going on !  You might want to place a set of the agreed expectations around the appropriate or inappropriate behaviours in the near vicinity and of course these can relate  to the goals and targets set from the initial consultation questionnaire (all this si covered in Stepping Stone 1 of HET).

REMEMBER TO ALWAYS PHRASE YOUR EXPECTATIONS IN POSITIVE WAYS:

e.g. try not to say what you don’t want – “I don’t want your room trashing this time”

Say what you DO want – ”I want to see you room kept clean and tidy.”

Your focus is then on the positive outcome and not the negative outcome. This makes a difference in what your child will deliver to you!

This approach is so much more effective in falling into the trap that so many parents fall into when they take something away from their child. How would you feel if someone in authority came and took something of yours away – pretty peeved about it, is the honest answer and this action will never get the best response from your child. In fact it is almost guaranteed to get he very behaviours that you are trying to avoid from your child.

How do you know if your child had shown appropriate or inappropriate behaviours when they are at school?

As we have discussed previously children will present very different behaviours at school to how they do at home for example – It is assumed at this stage that you were successful in achieving a consultation questionnaire with your child’s teacher (this is all covered in Stepping Stone 1) and that they have helped you to agree some SMART targets for your child. It is advisable at this stage to put in place a home/school diary, if there is not already one in place, whereby you have an opportunity to liaise over any behavioural challenges and PROGRESS (!) with your child’s teacher on a  daily basis.

A good way to see how effective your HET programme is in delivering the goals and targets you have set with your child is  to monitor the increasing number of good behavioural stickers that your child is achieving on a week by week basis. This information alongside the diaries that you are keeping about times when your child is triggering off unacceptable behaviours, is very useful to profile what exactly is happening and to  turn that around.

In HET stepping stone 2 we cover ideas for reward chart templates and stickers and look at how you can introduce positive behaviour tokens as part of a ‘buy back’ system and also introduce other reward tokens for other desirable and appropriate choices that our child is making. An example of this is following the Diet and Nutrition stepping stone, and the PHEW (Physically Holistic Exercise Workout) and the Eco therapy projects too! – Lots of opportunities to succeed and make good life choices which are evidenced through positive behaviours.

This approach is very helpful in focusing your ADHD child on desirable behaviour. It also encourages them to participate in taking the  remedies, following diets and nutritional supplements and achieving success through the HET Eco projects. Obviously, this approach is equally as effective with ADD and other behaviourally challenges in children.